My dear Gnomes and Sweet Cream dears:)
Here is some more artwork Darlins:)
These are two of the new Baby chicks....I am very soon going to name all of them...I have barley been able to breathe in between planting and such:) I believe I dug more dirt up yesterday
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This is one of the ducks:) I am looking forward to keeping little duckies:) I adore the way they waddle their tails :)
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....& of course this little girl...I kept on dreaming of this image, and I am glad I could bring it into reality:)
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I am not going to lie... it has been a tough 24hours... I do not know why I do it, but I keep the hardest of things that happen on the farm all to myself...as if when scary or bad things happen, if you do not mention them or let them infuse into other peoples memories, they really never happened...
I have lost animals...
I have faced many emotional and physical barriers as if being caught in invisible barbwire around higher hills and richer soil...
My dear and sweet Grandma is in the Hospital... I lost my Grandpa a few years back in the same hospital, and all I can do is pray and send hope above any fertile and thriving hope that she comes back to our farm for the oncoming spring... it is so tough with the elderly, never knowing what seemed so little might be horrible..or just the opposite...
I tried calling one person last night to console me... Just wanting to tell somebody about what is going on in my head and what lay heavy on my heart.... they must have been busy... but then I thought, maybe that is for the best..who wants to listen to me be sad over life and the changing of that...
it was a rough night... I came home from across the pasture after shutting up barns and such... I thought it was our dog buster in the chicken run, but then I saw that buster was right next to me... A coyote had the gull to creep into the chicken run and upon the site of me lunged it's self back over the wire...then buster and harold ran after the Coyote with a chicken in it's mouth....I ran after them both and saw in the distance many glinting eyes of the pack... then I imagined my sweet Harold being attacked by the pack or buster falling to them....I held back buster by the collar and he snapped at me... Harold obeyed with words... So I am down one sweet hen and I was one sad peach....
I did not call my family though, because I was afraid they would say "I Told You So...."
Of course they would feel bad and a bit scared for me, but goodness gracious... I just want to succeed in this life I have choosen, and not be looked at like crazy or a nucence of fanciful thoughts...
I really do not even know what to think...
I am crying right now over my coffee and muddy knees from trying to plant a few more strawberry plants this morn, but it became to windy, & I was eating more dirt than what I was using to plant...
Why cant' t spring be here right now, with the last frost having never come... That would be lovely if the fruit trees kept their blooms....Apricot cobbler and peach pie:)
There will be more chickens and I pray that Grandma will come out of this stronger than when she went in, but it can be so tough....so tough.... when you internalise things.... I do this because I feel as if a greater force needs me too... I am a very happy and optomistic person and I strive to always keep that... but gosh... I hate Coyotes ...I hate late freezes... I hate people being sick....& I hate feeling this way...
But I adore hope and knowing that life is good....the simple joy of knowing I have actions and those actions can make a diffrence..
Sorry for getting a bit heavy on you folks today...I just needed to get a few things off my gingham dress:)
I wish you all a lovely day and hold the life around you tight, and feel fortunate you were able to have it at all:)
Cheers, Beards & Banjos
Miss Samantha Joelle Honey Lamb